My God turns my darkness into light.
—Psalm 18:28

Once, it was a heartfelt crush on a drug addict and the first kiss that came later, a summer fling drinking with a bartender, endless bleeding letters to an Australian man I called my Moveable Feast, nights on my back defending myself against the cowboy hands of a Mississippi boy, and frequent phone calls to a dislocated Minnesotan who liked my Tennessee accent and wanted a wife who’d play the piano for him.

Now, I step outside and bend my head back to the fading fluorescent lights of your house, throw my arms     wide     and     wild,     look up to the sky and watch as bit by bit He opens the thick curtain of my darkness and brings out the stars. You step behind me knowing the constellations in me, the way I wax, wane, rise and set. You know what brings me out at night, and while you embrace me, I praise my God for the light—the peaceful silence, the hours of calm conversation, and moments on our knees in prayer. I praise Him for nights like this and the hands that rest on my hips with ease.

 

 

*in celebration of 12 years of marriage, I’m looking back at some poems I wrote during the early stages of our relationship. This was composed a few months after we married.

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